{"id":2472,"date":"2011-01-21T09:33:11","date_gmt":"2011-01-21T17:33:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/janaremy.com\/?p=2472"},"modified":"2011-01-21T09:33:11","modified_gmt":"2011-01-21T17:33:11","slug":"to-take-what-is-given","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.janaremy.com\/pilgrimsteps\/2011\/01\/21\/to-take-what-is-given\/","title":{"rendered":"to take what is given…"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"star<\/a><\/p>\n

An excerpt from \u201cDaisies\u201d by Mary Oliver:<\/p>\n

\u2026What do I know.
\nBut this: it is heaven itself to take what is given,
\nto see what is plain; what the sun
\nlights up willingly; for example\u2013I think this
\nas I reach down, not to pick but merely to touch\u2013
\nthe suitability of the field for the daisies, and the
\ndaisies for the field.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

After realizing how my skewed “sunny-side up” view<\/a> of the world contributed to the breakup of my marriage (because I simply wasn’t able to see what was in front of my eyes since I was so comfortable in my own view of the world), I decided I should probably tone down my rosy-colored outlook. It seemed that I would be better served by having a more realistic, perhaps even more somber, perspective. I began to wonder if I even really felt<\/em> the events of my breakup, since even in the dark times so many moments of beauty<\/a> came bubbling through. And even in the midst of those first few awful days, I could still see so much good on the horizon. What was wrong with me, I wondered, that I didn’t cry and scream and yell and melt into a ball of sorrow? Instead, I wandered gardens<\/a> and embraced friends<\/a> and enjoyed my children<\/a>.<\/p>\n

My insistence on optimism is a long-honed skill that stems from the difficulties of living with a disability <\/a>and the residue of having survived cancer, as well as a variety of other personal setbacks. I simply can’t seem to sit in the midst of a storm without seeing a silver lining. I deliberately choose happiness over sorrow, every time. Like the poem fragment above, I believe in “taking what is given” and seeing the light, whatever difficulties are thrown my way.<\/p>\n

But I don’t sit around with my head in the sand denying life’s cruelties, either.\u00a0 For example, for my dissertation research I purposefully chose to study the awfulness of life.\u00a0 Children suffering from horrific incurable diseases.\u00a0 Scores of soldiers dying for want of care.\u00a0 I pore over case studies of bodies mangled by machinery, or injured by the foolishness of quack remedies.\u00a0 I hold these stories in my heart, trying to make sense of a world where people suffer so often and so deeply (and, so needlessly)…<\/p>\n

But I think you can know the awful and still see the beauty.\u00a0 Which reminds me of a favorite quote from The Man of La Mancha<\/em>:<\/p>\n

When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies? Perhaps to be too practical is madness. To surrender dreams \u2014 this may be madness…Too much sanity may be madness \u2014 and maddest of all: to see life as it is, and not<\/em> as it should be!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

An excerpt from \u201cDaisies\u201d by Mary Oliver: \u2026What do I know. 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