Category Archives: family

Catgirl goes to Washington


the way she sees the world, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

Our teenage daughter is headed to D.C. in a few weeks to join in an FCNL delegation to lobby Congress for specific measures related to peace, the environment, immigration, etc. Catgirl is so excited about this opportunity and so are we!

This will be a big adventure for her and she’s already committed to blogging daily about all that she experiences. And you can bet that I’ll be linking to her posts and adding my $.02, too!

Members of our local Quaker Meeting are supporting her efforts and she’s also looking for anyone who might have an extra transferable JetBlue award to aid with her travel expenses. If you’d like to be part of her support team, please contact me (remyjATuciDOTedu).

Catgirl has asked for this trip for her birthday–isn’t that wonderful?* I can’t help but think back to when I was her age and marked my birthday that year by having my first chemo treatment (ugh!). So I’m super-especially delighted to help her celebrate this year in such a memorable manner! What an amazing gift she is to me, to our family, and to our community.

Pic above taken on our trip to the Capitol last winter, with the Jefferson monument in the background.

*By way of full disclosure…the birthday girl also asked for a pair of Cons in addition to the trip–she is, after all, a teenager! 🙂

a good hair day

Midday yesterday a neighbor dropped by for a neighborly chat (more specifically, she brought her pathology textbook so I could ogle the osteosarcoma x-ray images). I apologized for how I was dressed when I came to the door, explaining that my beachy clothes were rather soggy because I’d just gotten home from paddling with a teammate. Then John poked his head around the corner, he also damp and shirtless. He’d just stepped out of the shower. We joked a bit about the silliness of us both being home mid-day in a state of deshabille…

The truth is that we met for lunch so I could cut his hair–so he could look just a bit less mangy-Neil-Gaiman and a bit more GQ. I’m not the world’s best hairstylist, but I’ve been cutting John’s locks since we were first dating. There’s little else that I love more than plunging my fingers deep into his dark curls (and for those who’ve ever heard the story of how we first met, you know that that lovely head of hair was what first caught my eye).

So last night when I was at the Regina Spektor concert, I was so glad that she played Samson in her encore set…because it’s long been a song that reminded me of John–there’s something so powerful about his lovely hair, if only because it’s just one of those many things that make my heart melt whenever he steps into view.

PS: I’m glad he passed the hair genes on to at least one our kids. Methinks the world needs more good hair like his.

stepping stones…


Cape Cod, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

About a year ago I applied for membership in my local Quaker Meeting. Joining a Quaker Meeting is not like joining a religion like Mormonism–there’s not a proscribed set of rituals involved in the process and it’s largely a local matter.

My reasons for joining were numerous, but they boiled down to something very simple…it just felt right. Every time I considered the choice, I felt full of joy and light. I tried to talk myself out of it several times. There was no compelling reason for me to join–there was no barrier to my participating fully in the community as an ‘attender’ rather than as a member. But I also wanted to be true to the leading that I’d felt to join, especially when doing so produced such a strong feeling of satisfaction.

To join I wrote a simple letter to the clerk of our Meeting, explaining to her why I felt compelled to seek membership. Some important points in that letter included my desire to take on the identity of a Quaker, my family’s support in my doing so, and my acknowledgement that this choice might not sit well with my Mormon leaders. I expressed a desire to maintain a dual religious identity, knowing that both traditions are deeply important to me. Then the clerk, along with the Ministry & Oversight Committee, put together a group of women to serve on my membership committee. I met with them and discussed my feelings about seeking membership. It was a delightful experience and I felt such deep peace with this decision.

As a public acknowledgment of my decision, the Orange County Friends held a ‘Welcoming Meeting’ for me yesterday, which was an outdoor inter-generational potluck of Friends & friends. The Meeting presented me with a copy of Mothers of Feminism: The Story of Quaker Women in America, which I can’t wait to read (and what a great match for my interest in American feminism!)! Frankly, I was rather embarrassed to be the center of attention at this event, but also felt such happiness at celebrating this occasion with so many people that cared for me and my spiritual journey.

Officially becoming a Quaker changes very little about who I am, but it is one more important stepping stone on the path of my pilgrim-life. More than I can express with words, I appreciate all of you who are supporting me–either virtually or in “real-life”–as I make my way on this journey.

John took some great pics of my party.

some time away from it all


Huntington Library, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

Just returned from an anniversary weekend celebration with John. It’s so much fun to spend time relaxing and doing things with him! This weekend he took the reins and planned everything–I just showed up and played along. And every moment was chock-full of fun and memories.

Coming home wasn’t a downer at all, though. Re-connecting with the kids, the kitties, and the sacred space of our home was so grounding. Nothing (no nothing) can disrupt that peace.

Sundays, especially before a Monday holiday, are times for peace, love and connection. Such pleasure.

with her friends


girls at the beach, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

CatGirl doesn’t let me take her picture very often anymore. Like a typical teen, she’ll put her hands over her face or turn away when I point my lens in her direction (although she always seems willing to pose for John!)…
So I was so thrilled when a friend’s Mom recently took some pictures of CG & her friends at Crystal Cove. I love the way she captured the girls’ innate beauty and curiosity…
girls at the beach

girls at the beach

girls at the beach

so tall & strong


GameBoy’s getting strong., originally uploaded by mind on fire.

GameBoy sits in the “engine room” of a coed team boat in this pic, providing the strength for the team. His favorite seat is #1, where he sets the pace for the boat–his training as a musician certainly helps him with this!

Yesterday morning I spent about an hour repairing my old rocking chair–the seat had come loose, and it was in serious danger of completely falling apart. After tightening & replacing some screws, it was working quite well, so I called GameBoy in, took him on to my lap, and reminded him of the hours we used to spend rocking together–his favorite pastime in his toddler years. I even sang a few bars of one of the lullabyes that I composed just for him. He indulged his crazy Mom & curled up in my lap despite the fact that he’s just about as tall as I am these days. Back when he was a babe I could hardly imagine the day that he would be so grown up!

I couldn’t be more proud of him & his sister. I am awed by their strength and beauty.

in crimson


CatGirl in crimson, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

Perhaps it wil be CatGirl who will keep our Harvard dreams alive…she certainly has the talent to make it if she desires to do so. 🙂

Harvard-bound, 1990
Pic taken while we were dating and dreaming about our graduate school aspirations

so many roses


GrandmaB’s funeral, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

Grandma would have just loved this. All the pretty roses.

Do not watch the petals fall from the rose with sadness,
know that, like life, things sometimes must fade,
before they can bloom again.
~Unknown

sisters


DAVSDOTR, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

Grandma with her sisters (she’s on the far left). She looks so much like my older sister in the pic that it’s almost uncanny to me.

And, oh, aren’t those hairdos something else?

PS: I belive that the caption on this photo misspells some of the names. Did I do this caption over a decade ago when I was compiling my family history? I can’t even remember now…