Category Archives: simplicity

Pilgrimgirl classic: Our house is a very, very , very fine house…

Just for fun, I’m ‘reprinting’ this classic post from last year. Enjoy! 🙂

For your viewing pleasure, I’ve created a brief house tour video. This is for all those folks who are shocked/amazed/mortified that our family lives in ~750 sq ft of space. Of course, if we were in Japan, we’d probably have half this space and call ourselves lucky. But here in SoCal, our ‘living small’ lifestyle is definitely an anomaly.

The tour is limited to half of our home, so you’ll miss about five bookshelves (primarily the kiddoes’ books and our magazines and journals). TobyJoy decided not to make an appearance in the show (EllyCat is the star) and John, CatGirl and GameBoy were at school during the tour, so the house is pretty quiet. One note: I mention that the table in the LR is “my desk,” well it’s also the heart of our home. We eat meals, watch movies, play games, read books, pray, and entertain guests around this table. Even as I type this post, John and I are working on our laptops at the table, and CG has a whiteboard that she’s drawing on at the table.

Our home is my very favorite place. There is a lot of love within these walls. It’s not fancy, but it’s home. 🙂


PS: kudos to John for helping me to compress the video for youtube!
PPS: Did you notice my oh-so-vintage-cool record player?? I’ll play some of my 80s record collection for you the next time you drop by for a cup of tea 🙂

on simplicity…


peach blossom, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

Manifest plainness,
Embrace simplicity,
Reduce selfishness,
Have few desires.
~ Lao-tzu (604 BC – 531 BC), The Way of Lao-tzu

it’s a small world


nightstand, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

Here’s a photo of my nightstand/drawers with a couple of favorite candles on top.

Because we live in such a small space (~700 sq ft), we have to live ‘small’ in almost every aspect of our lives. Here’s an example: the top drawer of this nightstand holds my pajamas: my favorite blue plaid PJ pants, a t-shirt, a few prs of nylon shorts that double as exercise clothes, and a knit hoodie for cold nights; the middle drawer holds my underwear: tops, bottoms and 2 slips; the bottom drawer contains my sewing supplies and a few items that need to live in the nightstand of any happy couple.

When I was younger (and single) I had large drawers–easily 3 times the size of these–devoted to each of the above categories (except for the latter one).

Note: I lightly photoshopped this picture–changing it to grayscale and heightening the contrast just a smidge.

clothes. clothes. clothes…

Where do you draw the line between wearing clothes that are functional and comfortable, and those that might flatter your figure better or be more fashionable?

I picked up a copy of Adena Halpern’s Target Underwear and a Vera Wang Gown from the library yesterday, thinking that it might be an interesting rumination on the subject of clothes. Well, it was an interesting book if one wants to learn about the many designer outfits of the author, and how her well-heeled boyfriends have responded to her fashion choices. But not enlightening to me.

I’m sort of a fashion scrooge, I think.

Well, really, I love beautiful clothes. I enjoy looking through catalogs and fantasizing about owning cashmere sweaters, dresses of velvet and satin, or the perfect pair of butt-flattering jeans. And even though I do regularly spend money on clothes, I do so quite begrudgingly and with loads of guilt. The guilt doesn’t so much come from the money that I spend (although that can certainly be a factor). Rather the guilt comes from buying a commodity that, deep-down, I see as superficial, even worthless. Because I know that my body rarely needs new clothing. I have a closet and a chest of drawers full of items that I can wear for warmth and protection. So the guilt of from knowing that any clothing that I purchase is solely for my vanity. I do not NEED new clothes. So why do I keep buying them?

And I also know that clothing manufacturers routinely exploit women in developing countries, that many cloth fibers are grown in ways that pollute our environment, and that the modest amount of money I spend on clothes each month could easily support a family in Africa.

So, taking all of that into account, what’s a girl to do? Blow off fashion and continue wearing (and re-wearing) older clothes? Only buy from environmentally-responsible companies? Buy clothes with impunity, knowing that one’s choices are hardly a fraction of a drop in the bucket compared to worldwide consumption?

clothes that I have loved….

I’ve been absolutely enchanted by the story of this woman who wore the same little brown dress for a whole year. Every day. (And not to worry, she washed it every few days).

It’s started me thinking about my favorite clothes in my closet. Those items that I can wear over and over before I realize that they’ve been with me for years. They are soft and comfy like old friends.

-Right now I am wearing the black cropped pants that I wore on my first-ever trip to Europe 7 years ago. They are still super comfy even though I’ve had to rehem them several times. They are the pants I wore to Connecticut when I got embarrassed by the airport security person who discovered the secret safety pins that live in their waistband (oops).

-I have been wearing the same PJ pants nearly every day for nearly 10 years. They are a light blue plaid. I cut the legs off just below the knee and have never hemmed them. They’ve gone camping, have seen me through several moves and many late nights of reading. They are comfort.

-My favorite black sweater. ‘Nuff said there.

-My blue & white Nikes. Oh, these are so old and ugly now that I only wear them for gardening. The sole has split and is coming off of one shoe. But the second I step into them I am in heaven. No shoes have ever fit me so well.

Thinking about my few favorite pieces of clothing has made me wonder what it would be like just to wear those items. Or to make a dress that fit me well and to wear it every day. Would life be easier, because the question of what to wear just wouldn’t be there? Or would I feel stifled by the monotony?

When John and I were poor newlyweds I had two t-shirts and one pair of jeans that I wore almost every day. We called them my ‘uniform.’ At the time I remember being quite proud of them–I loved them and they fit me well. But life got a bit more complicated after I got pregnant and was forced to get bigger clothes. Now I have a sense of nostalgia for those days when I didn’t have to muddle through what to wear.

I’m also wondering if the preoccupation on how we adorn our bodies somehow distracts us from exploring and understanding ourselves?

’tis a gift to be simple…

This past month I’ve been praying, meditating, and studying about simplicity. My primary text has been Plain Living: A Quaker Path to Simplicity, though I have also used other texts about Simplicity, and have augmented my study with the Queries from my local Quaker Meeting (they are also focusing on the value of Simplicity this month).

For those who are interested, here are the queries [Note: ‘queries’ are questions that can guide your meditation and silent worship]:

“Life is meant to be lived from a Center, a divine Center—a life of unhurried peace and power. It is simple. It is serene. It takes no time, but it occupies all our time.” Thomas R Kelly, Testament of Devotion (1941, p.124)

“Simplicity, beauty, and happiness go together if they are a by-product of a concern for something more important than ourselves.” Elise Boulding, My Part in the Quaker Adventure

A life centered in God will be directed toward keeping communication with God open and unencumbered. Simplicity is best achieved through a right ordering of priorities: maintaining humility of spirit, avoiding self-indulgence, resisting the accumulation of unnecessary possessions, and avoiding over-busy lives.

Advice and Queries for all individuals:
Do I center my life in an awareness of God’s presence so that all things take their rightful place?
Do I live simply, and promote the right sharing of the world’s bounty?
Do I keep my life uncluttered with things and activities, avoiding commitments beyond my strength and light?
How do I maintain simplicity, moderation, and honesty in my speech, my manner of living, and my daily work?
Do I recognize when I have enough?

The more you have, the more you’re occupied;
the less you have, the more free you are.
~Mother Teresa

Check out my & John’s latest podcast where we discuss marriage, simplicity, spirituality, and the choices that have brought us closer together over the years.

shopping

I have no patience for it, really. When I was in high school and I needed to buy two pairs of pants, I went to a department store, pulled the two pairs of pants I needed off of the rack and bought them. Mission accomplished. My foreign-exchange student sister, who accompanied me on that errand, was shocked. She couldn’t understand how I could know what I wanted and then buy it, just like that. No browsing, perusing, debating. Just a simple purchase.

Today I went to a store to buy a new purse. I realized last week that the frayed handle on my current purse was sort of ratty-looking (even John pointed out that it was looking trashy, so you know it’s pretty bad). I figured it could be a quick 15 or so minutes at the store to locate a replacement. Not so. I couldn’t find anything tasteful, simple, well-made, and unleather. Also, the whole time I was there I realized that what I really wanted to be doing was sitting in my cozy pink armchair reading about 19th century hospital systems. Or riding my bike. Or sitting in my coffee garden. Or nuzzling the soft white stripe on Ellycat’s forehead. Or continuing to wear my worn-in purse….

thrifty girl


I love the saying: “Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without.” In an effort to minimize my impact on the planet, and to be more ecologically aware, I do all kinds of crazy things to recycle/repurpose/reuse. A few of my efforts:
–devoting time each day to moderate FreecycleIrvine
–using cloth diapers on my kids when they were babies
–maintaining 2 vermicomposting bins on my back porch. Shredding my junkmail and feedng it to the worms.
–buying much of our clothing from goodwill, patagonia, etc.
–recycling cans, packaging, etc
–adopting kitties from the local animal shelter
–buying produce from the famer’s market or organic items from Trader Joe’s
–maintaining a gianormous organic garden (weeding party, anyone?) and serving as the treasurer for the community garden council
–borrowing items instead of buying them. And loaning our stuff to others as needed, too.
–using both sides of printer/copier paper.
–trying not to patronize restaurants that waste food. And, not ordering more than I can/should eat.
–cleaning the house with plant-based products.
–giving gifts of time and love at holidays, instead of ‘stuff.’
–making household objects out of crocheted plastic bags
–bringing my own bags to the grocery store
–taking the train or bus when we travel instead of renting a car.
–wrapping gifts in re-used paper or in old roadmaps.
–making my own soap (laden with garden herbs).
[Note: I have ‘recycled’ this post by slightly modifying it for my ExponentBlog post]